Help those who bring this type of healing to discern and deal with the root causes of painful personal or family situations.

• The root cause is almost never the complaint first mentioned, nor the obvious sources of aggravation.
• If there is chronic bad behavior, find out why.
• Help those involved to listen to each other.
• Help those whose behavior needs correction, to be accountable to and meet regularly with a 'big brother/sister' or someone else who cares.
• Be firm with those who are denying reality, or who cover up bad behavior. Do not enter into their make-believe world, even for a moment. Help them to ask for forgiveness.
• Help those who are offended to give forgiveness.

For additional guidelines for counseling those in need, see Section 10, "Spiritual Care".

Find in Ephesians 4:14-15 several guidelines for helping those who are not facing the truth about themselves or their behavior.

Find in Galatians 6:1 the attitude we need, to advise someone to change their behavior.

Dysfunctional behavior and bad feelings about one's self arise commonly from incomplete or abusive family experiences in childhood.

• Its symptoms include inability to enjoy permanent relationships, inapt social responses, low self-esteem and inexplicable anger towards others.
• Healing usually takes many years. An adult who needs help must learn basic social skills from other adults, but these often reject them as misfits.
• As you learn about the personal histories of your people, listen for parents who were alcoholic, legalistic, cultists, divorced, abandoned, criminal, or in various forms of bondage.
• The dysfunctional person will often serve you and the Lord with all their energy and loyalty, but will need you to set goals for them and to show genuine appreciation.